I have been in several relationships that the need for approval reigned number one in the dynamic. This can really be damaging!!!!! It has taken years to balance, and I still catch myself involved in some of the game playing behaviors. The tables can turn,and before you know it.....you lean on that control when approval is not found. IN FACT...I even catch myself gaining control THROUGH approval.....I wonder what THAT really means LOL. When I catch myself in certain positions, I stop....and try to reevaluate the situation....check my motives and true feelings. I then adjust behavior as necessary. The key is to recognize and consciously change the behavior. Let me tell ya....some of the ugliest people I have known have lived inside of me!!! What did I want more of?? At times both control and approval. It is hard to see when what you really need is SELF CONTROL and SELF APPROVAL.
What DO I currently want more of?? Actually, the same thing I have really ALWAYS wanted...even if I thought it was something else I needed....BALANCE and INNER PEACE.
With so many dramas present in our daily lives, it is hard to be authentic, kind, compassionate, and acutely aware of one's own motivations ALL the time. Sometimes, there are things we don't want to recognize in ourselves. Sometimes we judge others so that we don't have to acknowledge that very thing in ourselves. When the world serves as a reflection of self (all judgements are self judgements) it can be a crushing experience. Finding balance and inner peace can be quite the task for some. Just remember that anyone we speak to...we are hopefully serving as a positive reflection to a piece of them!! (Hold everyone and the world in positive focus)
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Sunday, August 29, 2010
My New View.....How the Name Came To Be
I have an incredible story to relate. It is a story of my own weight loss and how it was achieved. There are many "diet" plans out there, but most add additional costs, or added time to your schedule. It seemed to me in 1995 or so that I had neither extra cash nor extra time. I weighed 240 lbs and was miserable. I felt awkward in my movements, and didn't want to be seen. I had trouble playing with my two young children and hated being fat. ONE DAY....after battling with anxiety attacks and medication that made me feel even more useless I had some kind of breakdown. Now, these can happen in either a good cleansing way, or in a way that is damaging. Mine must have been the good kind!!! I got very angry at the lady hiding inside of the marshmallow body I was living in. I began to imagine her breaking free. It had been years since I had seen her, it seemed. Every day I imagined myself fit. I invented what I called "Housewife Aerobics". This was a time saving exercise routine that on day will be a book to share with many. I simply did all of my activities of daily life in new ways. I paid close attention to the way I moved my body. I used muscles that had not been used due to a bad attitude. I changed little other than this. The results were 100lbs off in 6 months!!!!! Incredible.
I have read many cases in which diet therapies incorporate imagery into the plan. The fact is, most do not. Most diet plans and weight management strategies are very hard to stick with. They seem number based and are often very restrictive. This causes a bad attitude during the process. Anything that causes one to feel restricted is less likely to be a lasting solution. There is a chance of success initially, but long term success becomes hindered. The resulting bad attitude and anxiety actually becomes counter productive. With hypnotherapy, imagery, and self empowerment, the attitude is what changes. With a healthy happy attitude the things we need to do seem to come easily and in a more natural way.
I have kept all but 10-15 lbs off since 1995. That seems incredible to me. I looked unhealthy at 140 and like to stay in the 150-155 range. This is easily done. How?? Imagery, yoga, proper nutrition. I waste no time on crazy workouts. I make everything a workout!! I live with a New View of life...and attempt to share this with others.
I have read many cases in which diet therapies incorporate imagery into the plan. The fact is, most do not. Most diet plans and weight management strategies are very hard to stick with. They seem number based and are often very restrictive. This causes a bad attitude during the process. Anything that causes one to feel restricted is less likely to be a lasting solution. There is a chance of success initially, but long term success becomes hindered. The resulting bad attitude and anxiety actually becomes counter productive. With hypnotherapy, imagery, and self empowerment, the attitude is what changes. With a healthy happy attitude the things we need to do seem to come easily and in a more natural way.
I have kept all but 10-15 lbs off since 1995. That seems incredible to me. I looked unhealthy at 140 and like to stay in the 150-155 range. This is easily done. How?? Imagery, yoga, proper nutrition. I waste no time on crazy workouts. I make everything a workout!! I live with a New View of life...and attempt to share this with others.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
When Life Serves up a Hot Plate Meal
I am trying to hold on here. My stomach is turning with that fear that I so desperately try to let go of. As life coaching students, we learn to NOT hold fear, but rather to completely believe that if we are following the path with heart and soul, we will receive the support of the Universe. This is a fruity concept to most of the people you meet. It is judged as greedy, lazy, or self righteous by many. The common thought is against this very spiritual law.
I don't know about you, as a reader, but I KNOW the contribution I am making. I work just like everyone else, just on a different level, at the moment. My massage clients have lives that don't always include an abundance of spending and my efforts with community children often go unpaid in a monetary sense. I am hard pressed to continue doing the work I love, and the work I am being called to do.
This makes me even more determined!!!!! I have been marketing my services every way I can. I have been attempting to absorb myself in my schoolwork. I have spent money on bills and helping others. I am trying. I am holding this vision as I try not panic in this struggle filled time. I am, in fact, questioning why I keep struggling. I know what needs to be done. I feel strong on my path and am gaining the resources I need. Sometimes, things are just timed poorly...or exactly right.
My phone is out of minutes. This was my good morning. This happens regularly because I forget when the heck my cycle day comes. (HA literally...because my "other cycle day" and all of it's pain and glory came yesterday LOL) No phone. Not the end of the world. As I am babysitting the neighbor girls, I am absolutely glowing about the thought of starting a not for profit program for kids (especially little girls) that focuses on self empowerment and self esteem issues. I LOVE this idea and I have seen results of this work on the neighborhood children. I was sharing some useful yoga positions for one of the girls and having great one on one.When lunchtime arrived, I was quite surprised to find my gas service had been shut off. WOW! My glow was reduced to a faint glimmer in seconds. My energy dived under cover and I shut down all operations!! LOL
Building the glow back up now includes creative cooking ideas....reaching for that crock pot. My 18 year old son celebrates this!!! I will also be focused on long term plans. Why? I can't and don't deserve to struggle like this any longer. None of us do. I will take the opportunity to check into alternative means of funding this dream, and will explore those options. I just received grant writing information. I have many educational materials to write. I have several articles, assignments, and hypnotherapy scripts to write that may be a good use of the energy that it would normally take me to panic. I have no phone and nobody to call for a quick solution.....so on with the long term solutions and crock pot meals it is!!!
Kandee, P.L.M.
Professional Lemonade Maker =)
I don't know about you, as a reader, but I KNOW the contribution I am making. I work just like everyone else, just on a different level, at the moment. My massage clients have lives that don't always include an abundance of spending and my efforts with community children often go unpaid in a monetary sense. I am hard pressed to continue doing the work I love, and the work I am being called to do.
This makes me even more determined!!!!! I have been marketing my services every way I can. I have been attempting to absorb myself in my schoolwork. I have spent money on bills and helping others. I am trying. I am holding this vision as I try not panic in this struggle filled time. I am, in fact, questioning why I keep struggling. I know what needs to be done. I feel strong on my path and am gaining the resources I need. Sometimes, things are just timed poorly...or exactly right.
My phone is out of minutes. This was my good morning. This happens regularly because I forget when the heck my cycle day comes. (HA literally...because my "other cycle day" and all of it's pain and glory came yesterday LOL) No phone. Not the end of the world. As I am babysitting the neighbor girls, I am absolutely glowing about the thought of starting a not for profit program for kids (especially little girls) that focuses on self empowerment and self esteem issues. I LOVE this idea and I have seen results of this work on the neighborhood children. I was sharing some useful yoga positions for one of the girls and having great one on one.When lunchtime arrived, I was quite surprised to find my gas service had been shut off. WOW! My glow was reduced to a faint glimmer in seconds. My energy dived under cover and I shut down all operations!! LOL
Building the glow back up now includes creative cooking ideas....reaching for that crock pot. My 18 year old son celebrates this!!! I will also be focused on long term plans. Why? I can't and don't deserve to struggle like this any longer. None of us do. I will take the opportunity to check into alternative means of funding this dream, and will explore those options. I just received grant writing information. I have many educational materials to write. I have several articles, assignments, and hypnotherapy scripts to write that may be a good use of the energy that it would normally take me to panic. I have no phone and nobody to call for a quick solution.....so on with the long term solutions and crock pot meals it is!!!
Kandee, P.L.M.
Professional Lemonade Maker =)
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Rainbows On The Path
Yesterday I had a very early informal coaching session with a very close friend. Through the magic and spirit present in our unique connection we discovered and uncovered many aspects of BOTH of our paths that we may have over looked. I LOVE working with him!! He is a very creative man, and no matter how low he may feel, he is able to reach within for better...and brighter answers.
What's next? This is the question I run into the most. Well, the truth is we can only create a vision of our highest self and let ourselves be guided towards that. To FEEL that higher self within....really FEEL the joy and personal power...THAT's the next step. I found him positively charged within a matter of minutes and we both had the glow of what was within us. As we spoke, that glow became brighter and brighter. What a beautiful light!! My ten year old son joined in and before we knew it....he was glowing too!! This feeling is magical. So magical that I forgot my mother was flying in!! I haven't seen her in two years and I HAD been a bit nervous.
I received a call from my sister out of town. This was well timed, as she was to be the recipient of the surprise visit from our mother. My nephew, that has just recently returned to my sister's care after being in my home for three years or so, was in desperate need of school supplies. This was a great excuse to visit my sister and be able to see her reaction when my mother surprised her.
As the mail carrier walked up the sidewalk to my house I silently prayed that there would be money delivered to help my nephew. I was not expecting any money, but one could hope. I went to the mailbox with a vision of his little face when he received the supplies. There, in the mailbox, was a child support check. I don't receive these regularly so another prayer came that it would be enough. I opened it. To my delight it was DOUBLE the usual amount!!! I wept with relief and joy!!! My friend was fed even more positivity by the event and the house must have radiated for miles!!!
Later that day we went to my sister's house, supplies in hand for both my daughter and my nephew. It felt sooooo good. I had money left and decided I could buy a couple more useful items. I took my sister and my nephew and we bought her a shower curtain, and my nephew got some shoes and a bookbag. As we left the store we saw the vibrant full rainbow!! We looked again and there was a second one!!! I felt rewarded for my good deed. It was as if the universe smiled upon my choice to give this gift to them. I was worried that there was not enough money to do this....but I just KNEW I had to. Guess I was right. She still had no idea that our mother was coming. I giggled inside at what a day she would remember!! Her worries of supplies was relieved and she was lifted by the sight..."just wait until she sees Mom" I thought!!
I received a surprise later that evening. My brother was coming too!! He is the one I was going to move to Arizona to be closer to. I haven't seen him in two years either. I was so excited!! His flight was delayed, however, and as it turns out I never got to see my mother or my brother. I am excited to hear how the surprise went!!! I wish I could have been there to see them all cry and share hugs. I am filled with joy for the reunion!!
Maybe I will get to visit for a while during their visit. Maybe I won't. This was my sister's gift. She has had such a rough road. She has been reunited with her son and has another that just turned a year old in May. She and my mother never really got along. They have been healing that bond through the 1,000 mile distance and NOW is their time to celebrate!!
For me.....the most AMAZING connection with all that is, and a reunion with a love that transcends the earthly, biological family. I love my family, but a higher love exists inside of me that is every bit as bright and wondrous as the sight of that double rainbow on a Friday the 13th!!!
In Love and Light,
Kandee
The second is faint here....best I could do with my cell phone!!! LOL
What's next? This is the question I run into the most. Well, the truth is we can only create a vision of our highest self and let ourselves be guided towards that. To FEEL that higher self within....really FEEL the joy and personal power...THAT's the next step. I found him positively charged within a matter of minutes and we both had the glow of what was within us. As we spoke, that glow became brighter and brighter. What a beautiful light!! My ten year old son joined in and before we knew it....he was glowing too!! This feeling is magical. So magical that I forgot my mother was flying in!! I haven't seen her in two years and I HAD been a bit nervous.
I received a call from my sister out of town. This was well timed, as she was to be the recipient of the surprise visit from our mother. My nephew, that has just recently returned to my sister's care after being in my home for three years or so, was in desperate need of school supplies. This was a great excuse to visit my sister and be able to see her reaction when my mother surprised her.
As the mail carrier walked up the sidewalk to my house I silently prayed that there would be money delivered to help my nephew. I was not expecting any money, but one could hope. I went to the mailbox with a vision of his little face when he received the supplies. There, in the mailbox, was a child support check. I don't receive these regularly so another prayer came that it would be enough. I opened it. To my delight it was DOUBLE the usual amount!!! I wept with relief and joy!!! My friend was fed even more positivity by the event and the house must have radiated for miles!!!
Later that day we went to my sister's house, supplies in hand for both my daughter and my nephew. It felt sooooo good. I had money left and decided I could buy a couple more useful items. I took my sister and my nephew and we bought her a shower curtain, and my nephew got some shoes and a bookbag. As we left the store we saw the vibrant full rainbow!! We looked again and there was a second one!!! I felt rewarded for my good deed. It was as if the universe smiled upon my choice to give this gift to them. I was worried that there was not enough money to do this....but I just KNEW I had to. Guess I was right. She still had no idea that our mother was coming. I giggled inside at what a day she would remember!! Her worries of supplies was relieved and she was lifted by the sight..."just wait until she sees Mom" I thought!!
I received a surprise later that evening. My brother was coming too!! He is the one I was going to move to Arizona to be closer to. I haven't seen him in two years either. I was so excited!! His flight was delayed, however, and as it turns out I never got to see my mother or my brother. I am excited to hear how the surprise went!!! I wish I could have been there to see them all cry and share hugs. I am filled with joy for the reunion!!
Maybe I will get to visit for a while during their visit. Maybe I won't. This was my sister's gift. She has had such a rough road. She has been reunited with her son and has another that just turned a year old in May. She and my mother never really got along. They have been healing that bond through the 1,000 mile distance and NOW is their time to celebrate!!
For me.....the most AMAZING connection with all that is, and a reunion with a love that transcends the earthly, biological family. I love my family, but a higher love exists inside of me that is every bit as bright and wondrous as the sight of that double rainbow on a Friday the 13th!!!
In Love and Light,
Kandee
The second is faint here....best I could do with my cell phone!!! LOL
Friday, August 6, 2010
Food for Thought
We all know that this blog was created as a class project. I often feel that my education, however, is a personalized growing experience. This is not schoolwork. This is life. SWIHA has presented an opportunity outside of the "normal" college experience. I, after all, am not exactly considered "normal" by any means. I found this school quite "accidentally". The experiences,the chances for personal and professional growth presented to me by this institution have been unyielding!! Attending the online classes has introduced to me amazing new ideas and forums for publishing and sharing my insights and services. The tools are provided to grow and expand...and to present and share the life transforming journey.
I am writing this currently with the intention to share some personal moments outside of the classroom...To say that this entry has no connection with my schoolwork, however, would be a lie in so many ways =) I have been having so many days of connection....true connection....recently....so many moments of deep, yet humorous insight...I felt compelled to share some personal reflections , now, about the journey itself. I shall list these..randomly...as:
I am writing this currently with the intention to share some personal moments outside of the classroom...To say that this entry has no connection with my schoolwork, however, would be a lie in so many ways =) I have been having so many days of connection....true connection....recently....so many moments of deep, yet humorous insight...I felt compelled to share some personal reflections , now, about the journey itself. I shall list these..randomly...as:
You Might Be a SWIHA Student If:
(I am just an odd person....but if you find yourself doing these things...you might attend one of SWIHA's programs)
- You, after trying to convince your dog that baths are good, realize you MAY have just attempted to use "doggie hypnosis" or "doggie NLP tactics" on your dog!!
- During meditation you become acutely aware of the fact that the full commitment to wanting "balance to your accounts" might be a bit of a task to undertake and that "paying it forward" really IS the only way to live and spread positive energy to heal the planet and it's occupants. After all, we must be healed ourselves physically, and emotionally to be true healers. We will ask our clients to do some tough stuff. It is our turn now.
- You become aware that everyone at SWIHA has a story of how they got there. (Students and Staff alike.) You feel the unity and spiritual connectedness that is unique and nurturing.
- You find yourself talking to the air in front of your computer....people around you are no longer baffled by this, and you are comfortable (if not excited) about doing this. Everyone knows the characters in your life...and they somehow become part of the sharing =)
- GAWD...you just can't seem to get that flaxseed out of your tooth!! Anyone have a toothpick....wait...where's my 3 foot water bottle!!! (hahahahahahaha)
- As you shop, you can only hope someone asks about one of the many organics you have just gathered....you just found a new product and want to tell everyone about your find....and maybe...just maybe...send someone on a journey of their own.
- Your partner and friends give you that strange look....the one that says "uhhuh...yeah...what?? awww...your so spEcial" That's ok... you think the same about them...so everyone just laughs.
This is just the beginning. I believe that we are all here to learn and grow and share. I am enjoying these experiences and the chance to share with a whole group of like minded individuals through new avenues......and finding many positive adventures along the way!!
Love and Light,
Kandee
Love and Light,
Kandee
Friday, June 11, 2010
There are times when we need to slow the mind just for a moment in order to catch our breathes and adjust our attitudes. Slowing down to process every event, every morsel of this existence.
I am currently enrolled in the Mind Body Wellness program through SWIHA in Tempe,Az. I had planned to move to Az. at the end of this month. That did not happen. I decided to continue on with my educational plan, long distance. This blog is the result of my enrollment in a Holistic Nutrition class!!! I am amused slightly by this. Sure, I knew what an amazing school this appeared to be, but it is quite a bit more amazing than anticipated.
I would assume that those reading have deep spiritual beliefs of one flavor or another. I can respect that. I have had several "religious" experiences. Feeling that inner truth, that knowing and understanding of the connectedness of all and the connection to something higher is by far the most impacting of all human experiences. Knowing that your higher selves have potential for greatness is still rather unnerving to me. That means I must take greater responsibility in this world for myself, my actions, and also be responsible for assisting others. This is a big journey. Or at least it feels that way.
I realize that this is exactly what I signed up for. I feel as though I have lead weights attached to my soul. It is as though there is something holding me back. There is.......Nutrition and lifestyle....bugger....I have done it again. I will be gritting my teeth, kicking and screaming, but I will learn and implement what I can. I seem to do well with what I have, but I know where the improvements can be made and am just too lazy to change it. Ugh. Time for change?
I can already feel that I have a strong teacher who has gone through these very changes. He is not teaching from a college education with no real world experience. He has lived the transformation. Which means he is going to be be both understanding and a real stickler. I genuinely appreciate that.
I congratulate my fellow students on their decision to walk further down their paths. We are in for one heck of a ride. Hold on tight and get ready to grow!!!
Love and Light,
Kandee
I am currently enrolled in the Mind Body Wellness program through SWIHA in Tempe,Az. I had planned to move to Az. at the end of this month. That did not happen. I decided to continue on with my educational plan, long distance. This blog is the result of my enrollment in a Holistic Nutrition class!!! I am amused slightly by this. Sure, I knew what an amazing school this appeared to be, but it is quite a bit more amazing than anticipated.
I would assume that those reading have deep spiritual beliefs of one flavor or another. I can respect that. I have had several "religious" experiences. Feeling that inner truth, that knowing and understanding of the connectedness of all and the connection to something higher is by far the most impacting of all human experiences. Knowing that your higher selves have potential for greatness is still rather unnerving to me. That means I must take greater responsibility in this world for myself, my actions, and also be responsible for assisting others. This is a big journey. Or at least it feels that way.
I realize that this is exactly what I signed up for. I feel as though I have lead weights attached to my soul. It is as though there is something holding me back. There is.......Nutrition and lifestyle....bugger....I have done it again. I will be gritting my teeth, kicking and screaming, but I will learn and implement what I can. I seem to do well with what I have, but I know where the improvements can be made and am just too lazy to change it. Ugh. Time for change?
I can already feel that I have a strong teacher who has gone through these very changes. He is not teaching from a college education with no real world experience. He has lived the transformation. Which means he is going to be be both understanding and a real stickler. I genuinely appreciate that.
I congratulate my fellow students on their decision to walk further down their paths. We are in for one heck of a ride. Hold on tight and get ready to grow!!!
Love and Light,
Kandee
Thursday, June 10, 2010
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